Tradecraft

Before you go in

Know what kind of conversation you are walking into. Stay truthful. Let them talk. Leave them wanting to meet again.

Which conversation are you in?

Profile lens

Which conversation are you in?

The toolkit
How to use it

Before

  1. Decide which kind of conversation it is. That sets what is allowed.
  2. Write a protect list and a give list of 2–3 true, pleasant things.
  3. Pick the one tendency most likely to pull me today, and have its ready line in mind.
  4. For a new contact: know what they can find about me.

During

  1. Rapport first: friend signals, empathic statements, mirror and label.
  2. Let them talk most. Answer from the give list, then ask back.
  3. Draw out only with the tools this profile allows.
  4. When I feel a tendency pull, pause and use the ready line.
  5. Read in clusters, and follow up with a question, never a conclusion.

After

  1. Did everything I shared come from the give list?
  2. What did I learn that I didn’t ask for?
  3. Which tendency pulled me, and did I catch it?
  4. Did they leave moved, and would they want to meet again?
The wheel

The aim

Disclose little. Be received as a friend. Let them share, so you learn.

Three rules

  • Never say anything untrue.
  • Do nothing you would mind them finding out.
  • Treat the relationship as lifelong.

Be considerate.

Swipe sideways to see the whole wheel. Tap a dot to open it.

How to use it in a conversation

Before

  1. Decide which kind of conversation it is. That sets what is allowed.
  2. Write a protect list and a give list of 2–3 true, pleasant things.
  3. Pick the one tendency most likely to pull me today, and have its ready line in mind.
  4. For a new contact: know what they can find about me.

During

  1. Rapport first: friend signals, empathic statements, mirror and label.
  2. Let them talk most. Answer from the give list, then ask back.
  3. Draw out only with the tools this profile allows.
  4. When I feel a tendency pull, pause and use the ready line.
  5. Read in clusters, and follow up with a question, never a conclusion.

After

  1. Did everything I shared come from the give list?
  2. What did I learn that I didn’t ask for?
  3. Which tendency pulled me, and did I catch it?
  4. Did they leave moved, and would they want to meet again?

Rings, inside out

  1. Centre — the aim in one line, inside the three rules (nothing untrue · nothing you would hide · a lifelong relationship).
  2. Spine — the ten tendencies. Every technique pulls one; every deflection refuses one.
  3. Subjects — Protect → Rapport → Elicit → Read → Situations, clockwise in learning order.
  4. Tools — the working units inside each subject; each holds its cards.
  5. Arc — the eight steps of one conversation. Defend runs throughout.

Reading it

  1. The profile lens dims every tool not licensed at that profile — the licence is what changes between a peer, a client, a prospect and a negotiation, not the ethics.
  2. Dashed rings mark nodes related to the selected one: the tendency a technique pulls, the deflection that answers it.
  3. Node colour = subject, same as the card headers.

Redrawing by hand

  1. Draw the centre circle and write the aim. Ring it with the three rules.
  2. Ten dots around it, numbered 1–10.
  3. Five coloured arcs, sized to their tool count. Name them.
  4. Tool spokes out of each arc, one per node, label along the spoke.
  5. Outer ring: eight steps, 1 at the top, clockwise.